Desert Island Hammock
A mere 4,367 Euros! A lot of money for something to lie in, but this fantasy setting made tangible is worth every centime. The Desert Island Hammock consists of two artificial palm trees (over 2 metres high and UV protected) complete with very realistic Tahitian palm fronds and coconuts supporting a triple woven polyester double hammock. Both the hammock and the palm trees are built to withstand all weather conditions and there is even a rope drink caddy, pillow and best of all, the palm trees come with an integrated dual-control mist mechanism for keeping you cool on hot summer days. Your garden too could become a tropical paradise that will keep you off those all too realistic beaches.

Bath Caddy
A convenient 35 Euros. If, like me, you like to indulge in aromatherapy baths that caress your skin from soft baby pink through to hot red, prune textured cleanliness, this Bath Caddy is ideal. You can languish for hours in self-indulgent bliss, your chosen literature angled and held firm to avoid damp book syndrome and a glass of wine swivelling in the holder; all illuminated by the soft glow of a candle. You can even bring a buddy as there are two glass holders, you would of course have to have the same taste in books though as there is only room for one of those.

Luxury Faux Fur Suede Lined Throw
A sensual 200 Euros. After a day languishing in the tropical hammock, soothed by a calming bath, lulled into a fantasy world by an escapist novel and just a little tipsy from those two glasses of wine, then you want to wrap up in this. I have to suggest though that this is best used naked for full effect; I may never dress again. This sumptuous faux-fur throw is the height of delightful self-indulgence. Whether you are wrapping up alone or with another naked someone, this beautiful, silky stripy minx rug, with its soft faux suede reverse, is what nudity was made for. Best of all, nothing had to die to make it.

Naughty Weekend Kit
A cheeky 60 Euros. If you have managed to capture someone naked in your throw and imprison them in your agoraphobic tropical wonderland, then The Naughty Weekend kit may be a natural next purchase. No imagination required with this, all you could want for a spicy weekend is here - it does require you providing the other naked person though. Beautifully compiled by those masters at "Savonnerie", the ribbon-tied boxed set comes with a soft crimson velvet blindfold, 2 x 80g sachets of Love Soak, 20ml bottle Vetiver massage oil, Honeycake Soap, edible sweet Angelic Body Dust and Tender Kissing Glaze, a purple feather and a scrolled parchment of instructions for a weekend of delight. Pampering never looked so promising.

Erotic join the dots
Warning: Contains sexually explicit material - or rather will if you're any good with crayons. There's nothing like leaving it to your imagination, and The Erotic Join the Dots books doesn't much. This is a hysterical book, perfect for whiling away hours of time better spent improving your mind. It basically contains 60 marvellously cheesy top-shelf-of-the-corner-shop photographs. All the naughty bits have been removed and replaced with numbered dots, so you can let your artistic juices flow. It's the perfect present for a grubby brother, or an aged aunt who's still got a bit of go in her. Ahhhh, fun for all the family!

Gupi - Intelligent Robot Guinea Pig
Many's the time we've thought how life is incomplete without an animatronic Guinea Pig to hand, so imagine my joy when i found Gupi. To some he's little more than a battery operated canapé, but to me Gupi is a friend and companion for life - or at least until the next virtual pet comes along.

Aside from being able to wander about without clonking himself, he has different moods and behaviours depending on how you treat him, and makes more than thirty different sounds (which we're guessing is a great deal more than your average Guinea Pig). If you don't play with him he becomes lonely and scared, and he'll go off and hide in a dark place, but if you stroke him he'll feel loved, and will be happy. Gupi can also hear you, and will react to voices and sounds, depending on his mood. When happy he'll actually come running at you when you call him, but when he's scared he can't stand noise and will run away from it. When happy, Gupi will also follow a light beam so you can lead him wherever you want him to go.

As well as being a moody and affectionate little furball, he also gets hungry, and you'll need to feed him with his own special carrot. This is a charger that goes in his mouth and gives him a boost - he loves it! Each Gupi has its own unique identification codes, so when your Gupi meets other Gupis they will express excited behaviour and will learn gradually how to accept each other, how to share "food" (the magic Carrot), and how to play with each other - but without the drawback of real Guinea Pigs, they won't breed like rabbits, or like Guinea Pigs.

Gupi is the ultimate kids' pet - no litter, no little 'accidents', no damn sawdust scattered all over the place, and when you go away on holiday he won't go and die on you (leaving you with the cringing task of explaining how life is temporary, we all move on, and let's go and dig a hole in the back garden). At last, a pet that can withstand the rigours of child ownership.